Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Interview with the Calm One

Interviewer: Thank you taking time out from your busy schedule to let me interview you...

Calm One: Let's cut the niceties and get on with the interview, before I change my mind...

Interviewer: Sure. But before we do that, I need you to understand that everything said during this interview will be posted on...

Calm One: I know lah.

I: Okay okay... let's start with the first question, the one that all your readers are dying to find out...

C: It's only a tiny minority of them...

I: Okay whatever. *Ahem* Do you, or do you not, look like Jay Chou?

C: Judge for yourself - it's obvious.

I: I know lah, but I just wanted to have it straight from the horse's mouth.

C: I am not a horse.

I: Okay lah whatever. So do you look like Jay Chou?

C: You tell me.

I: Obviously you don't lah. But please answer the question, just for the record.

C: Fine. I do NOT, look like Jay Chou!

I: Relak lah... no need to get so worked up...


I: ... but won't your readers get disappointed?

C: Maybe they would, but what can I do? The truth hurts, and I'd rather be brutally honest with them now, than let them cling on to a wishful fantasy, only to be totally devastated much later when they finally find out the ugly truth.

I: Well... to make it easier for your readers to make the transition towards the truth, I think I'll just tell everyone that you do resemble Jay Chou, but just a leeetle bit...

C: I'll kill you if you do.

I: You can't kill me.

C: Why not?

I: Cos I'm just a figment of your imagination.

C: Hmmm.... but I still can shut you up.

I: Like how?

C: Like this. End of interview.

* * *

This interview is further proof that I DO NOT LOOK LIKE JAY CHOU!!!!

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