Friday, November 19, 2004

Calm Chou-der

Great. It seems like Jay Chou is going to have a concert here in Singapore, if I gather correctly from those irritatingly distracting TV Mobile ads on the bus.

* * *

I was at the CommunicAsia exhibition earlier this year. I can't remember whether this happened at the Panasonic or the Samsung mega-booth:

Promoter: Would you like to play this game? You'll get a chance to win a Jay Chou T-shirt!

Me: Jay Chou T-shirt?

Promoter: Yep!

Me: I hate Jay Chou.

Promoter (horrified look): Why???

Me: I'm jealous of him. Do you have other prizes?

Promoter (with mock pity): Aiyah... no other prizes. Can give the T-shirt to your girlfriend what.

Me: You siao ah!

* * *

Jay Chou wouldn't have appeared on my people-to-be-suspicious-of radar screen if the following incident didn't happen some time back:

"You know, you remind me of Jay Chou," a friend of mine from another course half-jokingly told me.

"Huh? What?"

"You remind me of Jay Chou."

"J what?"

"JAY CHOU!" she was losing her patience.

"Ermm... how do you spell that?" I was starting to feel a little ignorant.

"J-A-Y C-H-O-U! Don't tell me you don't know Jay Chou!"

I was starting to feel very ignorant.

"Actually... I've never heard of him," I mumbled weakly, "who is he?"

"Oh my god! You don't know Jay Chou! Oh my god!!!"

"So who is he?"

"He plays basketball!" as if I knew everyone in the world who plays basketball.

A search through my mental NBA player database yielded a total of 0 search results. The closest match was "Jay Williams". How could she know something about a famous basketball player whom I've never even heard of? And I was supposed to be the expert (self-proclaimed) in NBA trivia. Something was not quite right.

"Is he a good player?" I asked. Maybe she was trying to insult me by comparing me with a bad player, which would explain my ignorance.

She gave the rolled-eyeballs response coupled with an exasperated sigh, before kicking up her Windows Media Player in her Toshiba.

Was she going to show me some replay video clips showing him perform some wicked rim-rocking dunks? I didn't know she was into basketball...

"I'll show you one where he's playing basketball..."


The screen was filled with a whole list of Jay Chou files. I had a feeling that she liked Jay Chou.

"Ah.. this one..." she clicked on the play button.

This Jay Chou guy had better be good-looking, I thought, and he'd better display some decent ball skills.

There was music. Music? Is this another dumb MTV?

Then this guy appeared on the screen and starts croaking. Okay some people think it's singing. Whatever. He must be Jay Chou. But he doesn't look like me!

... and he's ugly!

Okay maybe I'm jealous that he's better-looking than me. SLIGHTLY better-looking...

Then he was shown fumbling around the ball. It was painful to the eyes.

Darn, he's giving basketball a bad name! This is sacrilegious!

"So how do you find him?" my friend asked hopefully when the MTV was finally, finally over, "wanna watch another one?"

"No need lah," I responded a little too quickly. "He's okay lah..." I added with unenthusiasm.

I think she got the idea. She never mentioned that J-word to me ever since.

* * *

If anyone has extra tickets to the Jay Chou concert, find someone else.


Blogger ningx said...

You just inspired me NOT to get the new jay chou cd.

3:24 PM  
Blogger clarclar said...


7:21 PM  
Blogger clarclar said...

to think that i signed up with blogspot just to leave comments for you...... you... you... you...... how could you? k lah acually its not big deal hahaha

7:25 PM  
Blogger Bubblemunche said...

I think I might as well come clean with you here: I'm a Jay Chou fan. But I like basketball too :)

8:00 PM  
Blogger Fat Fingers said...

hehe i didn't know who Jay Chou was too.. until someone made me listen to his songs.. never liked him.. never will..

9:14 PM  
Blogger Germaine said...

one thing i know about jay chou is that I can never understand or hear what he's singing. :/

10:15 PM  
Blogger FF said...

NOOOOOOOOOO! If someone has extra tickets, you take them and give them to FF. Understand?

10:23 PM  
Blogger debbeee said...

I felt immense sympathy for you -
You actually look like Jay Chou?

Perhaps you could bear a l'il resemblance in terms of musical inclination (note: not articulation, though) instead of looks?

Tsk, tsk.

12:06 AM  
Blogger calm one said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:13 AM  
Blogger calm one said...

ningx: Thanks. I'm now having this warm and fuzzy feeling, knowing that I've done a good deed =)

claris: Why not? =)
I have this feeling that you're a cra.. I mean serious Jay Chou fan. Not healthy.
Btw, you don't need an account to leave a message - my blog allows anonymous comments.

bubb: Jay Chou fan - not healthy.
Basketball fan - healthy.
Verdict - You're well balanced =)

Fingers: You seem to have an appreciation for the finer things in life =)

Germaine: Neither can I. Maybe it's because I'm too disgusted to be able to concentrate =)

FF: I can't do that - it's not good for you =)

Debbeee: Thanks for the sympathies, but I really seriously and thankfully don't look like him.
And I don't remember ever waxing musical around that friend of mine. Maybe she thinks everyone who plays basketball are alike...
p.s. I really wanted to tell you this, but I didn't know how to contact you - you misunderstood my post when you quoted me in you've got a good blog =)

* * *

This is worrying... I didn't realise that there were so many Jay Chou fans lurking around. Must be more careful about what I say next time!

12:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh yeah i realized that =S


5:50 AM  
Blogger A Popcorn Addicted Shopaholic said...

what? people saying u look like jay chou and u're complaining?? ok, must admit that he's not THAT good-looking but.. he's JAY CHOU!

p.s. if someone got free tix, don't give to FF.. give to ME!!! and i'll enrol myself to ur fan club (if there's any..)

8:10 AM  
Blogger calm one said...

Shopaholic: I SWEAR I don't look like Jay Chou! I SWEAR!!! Don't force me to post my pics online!!!! (wait long long)

If I get a free ticket, I forsee a big fight over it. To prevent that from happening, I'll just rip it to shreds.

9:16 AM  
Blogger Bubblemunche said...

*Psst.... Don't shred! I'll give $10 for a pair of extra tix :)*

1:23 PM  
Blogger Claris said...

There's nothing wrong with Mr Jay Chou.
You should feel honored that ppl commented that u look like him!
He's not horrendous looking from what i know...

And he's a talented dude. So be HONORED!

9:01 PM  
Blogger calm one said...

Bubb: I am deeply offended by your offer. I have my principles, and I intend to stick to them, so you can forget about getting those tix from me.

Any higher bids, anyone?

Claris: Sure, there's nothing wrong with him. Just don't compare me with him. Anyway my friend didn't say I look like him, only that I remind her of him. I don't think I look like him either.
Maybe he's talented in singing, but his singing didn't make an impression of me, so I'd rather have my singing likened to someone like Charlotte Church. Errmm.. make that Luciano Pavarotti.
But don't ever liken my basketball skills to his. I can take a lot of insults, but some things are just too much. Don't make me lose my calm!

9:20 PM  
Blogger Bubblemunche said...

Alright already! You get $15 instead. Think about it :)

12:09 PM  
Blogger Zen|th said...

Boo. I don't like Jay Chou too. He's just an average singer if you ask me.

1:56 AM  
Blogger Melissa said...

Excuse me, Jay chou has his own charm alright. Hahah, like those evolved ah bengs.Okay so he isn't exactly what the world defined as "handsome" but he is just.. well.. different? As to compared to, say, 5566 and f4? I used to go googoogaga over him. muahaha.

10:15 AM  
Blogger fruitsyrup said...

Well, *grin* i dont know what to say. But if you look like Jay, at least you are sure you will be popular with the female population even though you dont like him. And you have trailing adoring eyes looking at you everywhere you go!

11:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i like jay chou, in fact i've got all of his CDs. But i don't think he's a great musician, he just brings what has been happening in the world music scene into the chinese music scene. His sampling, layering and arrangements smacks of nothing more that good, however translated into the chinese r&b scene, this would make him a pioneer and maverick. It a great job he's doing improving chinese music (think F4 and bunch, including Machi). - ivan -

2:09 PM  
Blogger Yuki said...

Jay Chou Jay Chou Jay Chou....*rolls eyes* Is he that good? Haha, besides his name and his famous relationship with Jolin, I have to admit, I don't really know him lah. The only time I realized that he's around is last year, when my friends keep blabbing about him. And people around me is getting on my nerves, telling me they got the tickets to his concert. So i have to say two words:: SHUT UP!!!!!!!

P.S:: calm one, I suggest you sell your Jay Chou tickets if you got it at yahoo auctions. Can get higher price then what Bubblemunche offer you lah....

1:24 AM  
Blogger Scarlett Ting said...

You are a man of refined taste. I like :)

You could have given the tee to me!!! WHY NEVER???! my mum needs a rag u noe..

2:24 AM  
Blogger nubilewordsmith said...

If Jay Chou and Lucy Liu mated, the by-product of their corpulation might be a small-yello Stevie Wonder.

8:51 AM  
Blogger Bubblemunche said...

Yuki: Oei!! Now you tell him about the Yahoo auctions thingy, I'll have to offer a higher price liao :P!

Calm: Ok, this is it, final offer: $19.99 plus a few delifrance discount coupons :)

1:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

haha ok out of point but i worked at the communicasia lucent tech booth..yeah! =)


2:46 PM  
Blogger calm one said...

zen & ivan: i can't comment that much - i haven't really listened to his stuff much actually...

melissa: so u got tired of him? i don't know much about F4 and 5656..

dollie: i don't have "trailing adoring eyes" looking at me everywhere i go, proving once and for all that i don't look like jay chou!! =))

yuki: ermm.. I don't even know who's Jolin. and thanx for warning me about that cheapo bubble =)

scarlett: thanx.
a rag? hmmm.. never thought of that!

nubile: ermm.. I dun getch you...

bubb: you cheapo!! how dare you try to take advantage of me??
btw, when do the delifrance coupons expire?

sodiumion: I don't remember going to the lucent booth...

4:44 PM  
Blogger Bubblemunche said...

It expires on 30 Nov '04. Faster action :D! Cheapos United :D!

7:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, if you do really look like Jay Chou, then PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I wanna get to know you!! LOL~

Yes, I'm proud to admit that I am a huge Jay Chou fan. And I happen to think he's very handsome, contrary to what many other people think.

And in case you're wondering, I'm not some 14-year-old bimbo, but a wholly mature 21-year-old (who simply happens to morph into bimbo mode at the mere mention of Jay Chou).


P.S. Remember me? You left a comment on my blog about tips on smoking. Thanks for that, but NUS is under such tight surveillance it's completely impossible to march across campus, cigarette in habd, like your very bold friend.

11:38 AM  
Blogger calm one said...

Yet another reason why I'm glad I don't look like Jay Chou - one less 21-yr-old-acting-like-14-yr-old-girl to stalk me =)

p.s. Yeah I remember leaving the comment. But uh... I forgot where your site is now. +)

11:40 PM  
Blogger Merenwen said...

Well... I'm not gonna openly post it here, but you can find it through Mr. Miyagi's Days Were The Those army blog. I contribute there.

How DID you find my blog in the first place then? It's not even a blogspot blog!

1:31 PM  
Blogger calm one said...

One more reason why you won't like me, even if i look like Jay Chou - i hate wearing uniforms.
but i don't look like him - my hair is much shorter. some girls keep buggin me to keep long hair. crazy girls.

2:58 PM  
Blogger Merenwen said...

Haha... guess you read my explicitly shameless post.

Anyway I'm guessing the reasons why you don't wear uniforms is 'cause 1) you're in poly, and 2) therefore haven't attended NS. When you're finally in NS, do put up some pics of yourself in uniform then. It will enliven your blog (and contribute to the uniform porn site Agagooga and I are planning to set up).

LOL~ Just kidding lah. I'm not that nuts!

7:28 PM  

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